will they write me back?

i need to know if this is creepy or not...

Dear Wolves in the Throne Room,

Hi, my name is Arwyn. I live in a fox den in Austin, tx. It is my understanding you will be playing a show here in less than a week, unless your RV breaks down again. If you don't have to leave austin right after you're done playing (which I understand happens often with bands) you should consider staying at my house that night for a slumber party. Now, i live with kids, so we'd have to keep it down, but my fox den is mostly separate from the rest of the house, so we wouldn't have to ridiculously quiet or anything. just aware of our voices.
anyway, the slumber party would entail walking to the grave yard by my house, looking at stars, playing the game ninja, sitting in my fox den by candle light, listening to black metal, looking at my joanna newsom trunk, looking through my collection of bones and gossiping about whatever. We could also play uno, hot dice, scrabble or bananagrams. Or all of those games. And Never-have-i-ever. I would also tuck you in when you went to sleep. All of you. And make you espresso in the morning and wave to you as you drove off in your RV...
SO, if you want to come have a slumber party with me in my fox den (which is actually a garage that looks like a cabin inside) you are welcome to come over after the show. I promise we will have fun. I promise i'm not a creepy. I promise we can drink tea.

One day we'll be real friends in real life.

high fives,
Arwyn La Fox

things i've discovered in the last 24 hrs

-when i don't drink coffee i cry all day, unless i can go back to sleep
-some people hate sluts even though they're female, at least, according to a comment on youtube.com

what???

I CAN'T STOP COUGHING.

list of things i'd like to do

today, Thursday, August 4th, 2011

-sleep
-brush my teeth
-take a shower
-lay in bed looking out the window
-sweep my foxden
-write
-sleep
-hide under a blanket
-tell people calling my work to go fuck themselves

conversation with cha cha

me: are fire ants one of god's creatures?

cha cha: Hey, b4 we answer, pls help us personalize ChaCha to better meet ur needs. just answer 4 short Qs! Q1. what is your gender? txt MALE or FEMALE back to us.

(cha cha doesn't understand that sex and gender are 2 different things)

me: FEMALE

cha cha: Q2: What type of phone are you using? Txt 1-Windows Mbl, 2-iPhone, 3-Blckbry, 6-other phone w/web, 7-other non-web phone

me: 7

cha cha: *duplicate* Q2: What type of phone are you using? Txt 1-Windows Mbl, 2-iPhone, 3-Blckbry, 6-other phone w/web, 7-other non-web phone

me: 7-other non-web phone

cha cha: we could chacha much better if we knew ur phone: Txt 1-Windows Mbl, 2-iPhone, 3-Blckbry, 6-other phone w/web, 7-other non-web phone

me: 7-other non-web phone

cha cha: WOOT! you're nearly half way done with our survey! Txt 1-Windows Mbl, 2-iPhone, 3-Blckbry, 6-other phone w/web, 7-other non-web phone

me: 7

cha cha: we'd love 2 ans ur Q, but we cant til we know ur phone: Txt 1-Windows Mbl, 2-iPhone, 3-Blckbry, 6-other phone w/web, 7-other non-web phone

me: other non web phone

cha cha: Q3: What's ur ZIP? This helps us answer ur Qs better and hook u up with Hot Deals on food, fashion, fun!... Txt ur Zip code like this example: 71659

me: 78722

cha cha: *duplicate* Q3: What's ur ZIP? This helps us answer ur Qs better and hook u up with Hot Deals on food, fashion, fun!... Txt ur Zip code like this example: 71659

me: 78722

cha cha: No worries, ur info is safe w/ChaCha, and if we know ur ZIP we can give u better answers on MovieTimes, 411 and deals that matter 2 U! Txt like this: 71659

(does cha cha know i'm lying by 4 blocks??)

me: 78722

cha cha: Don't give up now! Ur already halfway done w/our survey and then u can get more ChaCah answers! Txt ur Zip Code like this example: 71659

me: 78722

cha cha: Hey, if u don't complete r mini survey we can't continue 2 provide answers! Ur nearly done! Txt ur Zip Code like this example: 71659

me: 78722

cha cha: Aargh, if u don't complete r mini survey we can't continue 2 provide answers! you're nearly done! Txt ur Zip Code like this example: 71659

me: 71659

cha cha: News flash: If u don't complete r mini survey we can't continue 2 provide answers! Ur nearly done! Txt ur Zip Code like this example: 71659

me: news flash i have sent my zip 5 times! 78722

cha cha: Stuck on this survey Q even tho you're trying? Go 2 customer.relations@chacha.com, and send us an email with 'SURVEY' in the Subject line. We'll rescue u!

i email "customer.relations@chacha.com" the conversation.
an hour later i still haven't heard back, and i can't wait much longer.

me: 78722

cha cha: Last Question! Q4: what is your age? Text your birthday in month.day.year format, ex. 06.09.90

me: 02.01.87

cha cha: *duplicate* Last Question! Q4: what is your age? Text your birthday in month.day.year format, ex. 06.09.90

me: 02.01.87

cha cha: Xbox or reading glasses? We can give u cool offers if we know ur age. Just txt ur birthday in month.day.year format, ex. 06.02.90 Ur nearly done!

i don't want a fucking "Xbox", i want to know if fire ants are god's creatures!

me: 02.01.1987

cha cha: That's it! Thanks for taking the time to make our service more useful to you. The Answer to your question is on its way! ChaCha on!

my answer?!!?!?
after 20 minutes i still haven't gotten "The Answer". i text again.

me: are fire ants one of god's creatures?

cha cha: call 631-403-2055 if you love America!

cha cha: ChaCha Crystal Ball says: This is the first time I've really changed my mind, my insides are crystal clear and the answer is YES!

what?
10 minutes later

cha cha: *duplex* That's it! Thanks for taking the time to make our service more useful to you. The Answer to your question is on its way! ChaCha on!

cha cha: Ur girlfriend called- she's got a message for u:781-452-4079

what girlfriend?

cha cha: Yes, ants are definitely living, breathing creatures, although ants, like all insects, don't have lungs. They breath through tiny holes in their sides called spiracles, one pair per segment. ChaCha!

the only thing helping me through the day

http://www.lolcatbible.com/index.php?title=Main_Page


Now, teh burth of teh Nointed Cat was liek dis: After Mary and Joseph wuz all "We get maerdied, kthnx", but befor dey haz hankiez pankiez Mary was a muthur cat thanx 2 HovurCat.19 Joseph was liek "I haz virjn - NOOOO dey be stealin my virjn! Must hied hur".20 But when he was tihnkin, zomg, a BirdCat frm Ceiling Cat was liek, "Oh hai! Iz in ur dreemz, givin u messij. Don be scairdy cat. Taek Mary as ur wife - is virjn. But teh Forse is strong in tihs wun, lol! HovrCat is on hur, givn hur kitlin, srsly."

everyday to do list

to-do list for everyday of my life
*GET OUT OF BED
*drink coffee
*go on morning walk
*drink water
*do kegels (kegals? spll?)
*eat fresh fruits and vegetables
*stretch
*don't kill myself (out of purpose or negligence)
*wear stylish pieces of metal
*be present
*finish something tiny
*kiss a furry creature BUT NOT A FURRY
*clean

list of things that are weird

list of things that are weird that i'm thinking about today
*when you hear someone's name all the time and then somehow find out they're involved in something you're involved in through the internet
*when you then internet stalk them to complete your picture of how they play into your friend's lives
*when people use the term "you" to mean "me/I"
*getting kittens from my roommate's ex-wife/partner
*dolly parton's face makes the perfect tattoo
*jealousy
*language and it's power
*communication, lack of communication, the complexities of communication
*when communication meets the internet via comments sections
*chickens

i wish

list of things i wish, today, wednesday the 18th of may 2011
*kittens
*i had more coffee
*active listening was a skill taught in every grade level of every school
*i had taken mediation classes when i had them for free in high school
*i had a dolly parton tattoo... ?
*a new tube and one of those plastic things to fix my flat tire
*a magic carpet
*a lot of things

holy shit!!!

dear horrible future

are you for real? come on, this is a joke.

right?

things that have happened

trying for chronological order, no guarantees!

-years ago on february 1st i was born. true story.
-2 weeks ago i was masturbating and i got bit by a mosquito right as i was going to orgasm. it totally ruined it.
-several nights ago i was in houston, i overheard my good friend Cupcake talking to someone about why we shouldn't talk to the cops. i went over to join the conversation, the person my friend Cupcake was addressing said "it's not just about not talking on principle, it's about making sure that we don't make our comrades seem suspicious when they don't talk" and i almost said "who are you and how'd you get so hot and southern?!?" but instead said "yeah, for sure"
-the next night in houston i was on a panel for the movie Better This World. there was a discussion about accountability and some said "we can't base a movement on interpersonal interactions, because we will always get let down and never build trust". i said "i don't know if i agree with that, because i think we'll always get let down no matter what. i don't trust these people because they will never let me down, i trust them because i know if they do we can talk about it and it's not the end of the world". since then i realized my "activism" is entirely based on interpersonal interaction.
-this morning i woke up, talked to my crush, played with a baby, drank coffee and walked the dog. READY FOR REALITY
-i went to the library the other day and read a book called Sneaky Salamanders, my heart filled with so much affection i thought i'd explode.

this is going to be ridiculous

things i thought when i woke up this morning:
-i love comal haus
-i love sleeping next to friends
-holy fuck stop telling me the time, phone.
-why do i taste like beer?
-i could just quit my job, and then i could go back to sleep


things i'm wondering right now:
-why can't we just communicate?
-what the fuck, gender roles?!
-if people know when i'm joking...

things i found on my shirt, today March 3rd 2011:
-dust
-down feathers
-bread crumbs
-hazelnut milk stains
-cat hair

dear chihuahua next door

not that innocent!!!

Dear Chihuahua Who Lives Next Door,
fuck you.
seriously.
this morning i was just waking up, outside i heard the noises of my 7 yr old roommate romping around, playfully. i had just had a great dream and woken up before my alarm clock, staring out the window at the trees moving softly. in this dreamy, slightly awake state i suddenly hear you, Cocoa, barking your goddamned head off. as i hear you everyday, multiple times a day, every time me or someone else in my house walks outside.
we've never done anything bad to you, Cocoa, yet you're completely filled with hate for the 3 of us and any of our friends who walk into the back yard. why? it's not your territory, it's on the other side of the fence for christ's sake. it's clearly not you job to defend OUR backyard. we've never come into your back yard, not even tried, ever! yet you feel so threatened and hate filled towards us that you sit at the edge of your territory and wait for the back door to open so you can make sure we know and understand that you want us to die. what the fuck, Cocoa?! We don't bark at you! Neither do our dogs- Tasha and Clover. In fact, Tasha completely ignores you and doesn't pee on your fence, she never threatens your territory! no one does, yet you act like we've tried to kill you and pee on your land over and over again.
i have news for you, Cocoa, land ownership is silly, so are borders and so are you! you're more than silly! you're deranged. How can something so small be filled with SO MUCH HATE? i don't understand, but i hate you back! shut up in the morning or i'm peeing on your side of the fence!!

-arwyn, human next door

things i'm excited about today, right now, at this moment, today

*coffee exists
*i'm drinking coffee
*babies exist (humans reproduce? and cats!)
*friends in town from houston
*radical consent workshop tonight
*dealing/pushing kittens
*friends!!! friendship!! related things!
*the idea of seeing my friends who are far away
*crushes! both in austin and far away
*coffee
*email from Nick Riotfag (who doesn't know he's my future bff yet, but soon will)
*breakfast tacos
*the clueless soundtrack
*friends in town from san antonio
*accounting for radical/anarchist businesses (oxymorons?)
*talking about accounting
*friends fighting grand juries and winning!
*the friends i've made in resisting grand juries myself
*building trust in communities and shit
*BETCH (http://betchatx.blogspot.com)
*people challenging the gender norms
*thinking about consent in broader contexts (but still also in sexy contexts)
*rancor fighting fascism at treasure city thrift!
*coffee as an anti-depressant
*MAGNETS